me me me me

The song goes like that.... I hum it sometimes when my mind stops working, and I stare in front of me at the computer and then pick up the messages blinking on it and save the folder and then delete them because I don't want to go see another face that is going to go away.

Everyone goes away, in the end.

I lie. In this angry mass of burning spirits I float and churn inside, willing to calm but unable to do so... willing to give in but unable to run out of my molten spirits.... I am like the lava that erupts and pours through, the bile, the unbearable lightness of being in nothingness.

Will you carry all? My empire of dirt??

And I forgot the words, but the essence is still there. The essence is there in the short spurts of enthusiasm, the childish outstretch towards something.... something. But I find nothing. I see nothing. I feel nothing.

NO Thing is. But what is not?