So what if one day I look into your eyes and see nothing but friendship? I can and do live with it. Even if I know that inside I am being smothered by that friendship, I can never tell you what you mean to me and how much I need you or silly things like that which comes between you and me.
You know, that is the problem. We are similar people who are afraid of each other. Afraid? No no. Wary is more like it. We move around the topic, skirt around the game, but we both know one day its going to be out.
And I know you can't handle the truth so why don't you sit on your pretty ass and smile back? Why take those moments to watch me (and I know when you watch me when you think I am not aware) and then pretend nothing is up? Why make those moments of non-performance with me? Why?
I want to tear you apart and see what you are inside. I want to chew your guts and ingest them. I want to make you such a part of me that you won't know where I begin and you end.
But I won't.
Because for my life, I shall never tell you what you are and how much you mean to me. Even after what we have done. Even after this whole mess.
I won't. Just you see. You were different once. Now you are not. Now you are not.