OKAY

Before I begin the post, I believe I will be starting a Hunk-of-the-month thingy .... and the first one is Hugh Jackman!!

this post was a mishap. Why else would dear Panu sit up at the late hours to pour out bitter misery and murderous passions to the unsuspecting handful of poor creatures that make the mistake of entering the rightful space she owns in the blogsphere?

Panu can give very simple reasons for this mishap.

a. She was under the delusion that she was Liz Taylor after her 6th divorce and therefore this whole post was a sign of the old gal finally going off her rockers.

b. She had a bout of stomach flu after the three humungous scoops of Bavarian Dark Chocolate Chip Ice cream with chocolate sauce, wafers in a chocolate and nut covered waffle cone that she shamelessly wangled out of a poor, unsuspecting creature who didn’t even guess what hit him till he was paying the bill.

c. She had finally read The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night Time By Mark Haddon and My Name Is Red By Orhan Pamuk on the very same day when she was supposed to study Foucault’s The History of Sexuality II and was thus suffering a massive attack of guilty conscience.

d. The aforementioned 1st book in c. was the direct reason for her to believe that she was detached from the rest of the world and a math freak (as if!! Panu suffers everlasting Mathophobia to its full extent).

e. She was swamped by old familiar faces and was swamped by nostalgia as she joined Orkut and made 84 friends in 1 week and 3 days flat, and realized she was virtually the last person to know about it, everyone else(other bloggers, that is) were talking about it since ages.

f. The particular guy mentioned in the post was featured in one community in Orkut that she too joined.

g. She found out that her biological parents still went at it like rabbits, for she discovered their condom supply (and this is the end of this point).

h. She received a large box of Belgian Non-Industrial Chocolates from her cousin Big Brother along with Yves Saint Laurent’s Paris perfume which resulted in a late-night -drinking party with father and the Brother, directly inducing all of the long-buried pains to emerge from the darkest parts of personal wastelands of Panu’s consciousness.

i. The exams. Bloody buggers. And still bugging the hell out of her poor, pious soul and ass.

j. Old diaries that came out with the annual room cleaning. This room clearance thingy is Panu’s greatest grievance every year. Panu hates a clean room. A room is just not a room unless it’s down and dirty.

k. A and her boyfriend’s intimacy. Jealous Panu sneaks around, unable to express her own grief at seeing unworthy hands maul her precious Andromeda.

l. Her second blind date and third marriage proposal.

m. The aforementioned Belgian Big Brother’s revelation of living together with a Belgian Girl friend (to the utter consternation of the parents) who is six feet tall. Brother and Girlfriend look like Ken and Barbie, reminding Panu (poor darkling that she is) how Even Undateable creatures ( Own admission, mind you... here Panu is being a bitch and loving it.... back off Helen, Bindoo, Dholakia) are getting adoring drools and she getting nothing. No loving. Nada. Nil. Zip. Zilch.

n. She has been lost in The Waste Land, drowning in Death in Venice, sweating with Sappho, fighting with Prufrock (not JAP the blogger), simplifying Symposium, courting Kureshi, screwing Sula, massacring Murder in the Cathedral, Sexing the 'Peare, Snorting at Sade, Hammering at The Hollow Men to no avail. She is still grappling with her syllabus and ending with nothing.

o. A visit to a Medical College Fest (Zephyr, 06) and screaming one’s head off with Bhoomi’s songs.

p. And this is the end of it, Panu has just discovered that http://aibbappsss.blogpot.com (mark the lack of the ' s' in blogspot spelling) leads to a Mega Site for Bible.


Lots of mishaps are going on in Panu’s otherwise nonexistent life. Simultaneously. Panu hates doing so many things together. Even Superwoman needs rest. But it seems this lazy ass is doomed to an existence of misguided activities, doing things that she should not, saying things that get her into trouble. Panu tries to control these wayward emotions, but just when she believes that she’s got them under her thumb, out pops a new one. And then the eternal, flaming racket repeats again.

Well you who has passed all these barriers of broken bits of my life, know now, what exactly have you been doing reading my post.

Correct. You have been reading what I went through in one single day of existence.

“Beauty is truth; truth beauty”

Or, in the immortal words of Porky Pig:

"That's all, folks."